Dying to have my period, literally
Getting my period was supposed to be fun. I had no clue starting my period would lead to a lifetime of excruciating pain, both physically and mentally.
Here’s my period story.
Getting a menstrual period in some cultures is considered a coming of age milestone for young people growing up with a uterus. For me, I just wanted to be able to share period stories with the rest of the girls in my sixth grade class. In junior high school there seemed to be two things that were important to the girls in my class: developing breasts and getting their periods. Like my extremely slow growing breasts, my period was also taking its time. Although I did not have my period and did not qualify to share period stories with the other girls, I still managed to relate to the stories that I overheard about painful cramps.
For at least a year before starting my period, I remember having monthly and extreme pelvic pain every single month. I winded up at the doctor’s office a lot and once or twice in the emergency room. I found it weird that I had not started experiencing menstrual cycles, but I’d get terrible stomach pains or cramping. If I look back even further, I actually got stomach-related pain and sicknesses 1-2 times a year since the age of seven or eight. My parents and doctors ruled them as stomach viruses, as they only lasted a few days. I can only wonder if those “stomach viruses” were early signs of endometriosis, which is not a far-fetched idea. According to the Endometriosis Foundation of America, it takes women about a decade to be diagnosed with endometriosis. Does this include data on the delay in diagnoses in black women due to the undermining of black women’s pain (more on this later)?
I eventually started my period at age 12. I remember being extremely ecstatic but that excitement quickly escaped within the next hour as I began experiencing horrible cramps. My mother offered me a Motrin. One pill did not help at all, it seemed to actually worsen the pain. Six hours later, my mother allowed me to try two pills. The following day I was met with more pain and heavy bleeding. It continued like that every single month until earlier this year. Every month I experienced terrible cramps, which were the most intense on the first three days of my period.
The glorious period experience I longed for became nothing but a traumatic inconvenience, especially when it came to my studies. In high school, I remember being doubled over in pain and having to be picked up from school on every first day of my period. The second days were pretty bad, but mostly manageable once I stuck to my pain relief routine: food+hot tea (preferably ginger)+pain killers (+hot water bottle if I was at home). In college, however, my heavy bleeding and pain only seemed to worsen and resulted in decreased sensitivity to pain killers. At this point, I would take three Aleve (Naproxen) pills at 250mg each every four hours as needed for the first two days of my period. For the remainder of my cycle, I would give my kidneys a break. You can read about my more recent graduate school experiences with my periods here.
It is not “just a bad period.” If you or someone you know suffers from terrible menstrual cramps, pelvic pain during or outside of your cycle, heavy bleeding, spotting in between periods, pain with sexual intercourse and/or orgasms, or digestive issues, etc, PLEASE speak to a gynecologist (GYN). If they don’t take you seriously, get another opinion, especially if you are a woman of color. Take your pain seriously, and find a provider who will take it seriously, as well.